Writing Prompt: When were you most frightened?

When were you most frightened? 😨

This is an interesting question and one I had to really sit down and think about. I don’t know that I’ve ever been properly frightened for myself. Though, there certainly were some situations were I ought to have been reasonably more frightened than I was.

The first thing that comes to mind has to do with my kids. One went missing in the mall, my big boy cracked his head on the driveway, lost another in Menards one day, little boy fell down a steep flight of steps, had one runaway for a week. Woo-boy… these kids! But again, not sure I put these things in the ‘fear’ category. Worried, anxious, pulling my hair out… but not what I describe as fear.

The second thing that comes to mind was the first (and last) time I went through one of those elaborate haunted houses they setup around Halloween. This one was pitch black and had ‘actors’ jumping out or chasing you in their part of the ‘stage’. This experience was disconcerting. I hate, hate, hate being unable to see what’s around me. I certainly got my money’s worth on that visit. I don’t know that the prompt was meant for self-induced carnival-level fear.

There was one situation where I was literally shaking from some combination of anxiety and denial and I guess a destabilizing flavor of fear. I wasn’t scared for my person. It was more that I thought my reality was caving in, I think. This was when my Aunt was murdered. I don’t suppose there are many things more surreal than being told a loved one was murdered. That’s a sharp distinction from dying of old age or a car accident. It was the State Agents coming to my home to interview me that had me in convulsions. I had been the last person to talk to my cousin on the phone right before she went missing and her mother was killed. I think them coming to talk to me somehow made it an nth level of real that I could not process. It’s hard to process even now, fully a decade later.

I’m a staunch believer in science and logic. Perhaps it is that understanding that saves me from living in fear. Of course, if there were some unexplainable phenomenon that unfolded before my eyes it’s possible I might feel differently. Coming up with things that have truly scared me in my life is difficult. I am also a big advocate of not living in fear of things you can do nothing about. I tell my kids that all the time. Better to try and fail then be too afraid to try.

I do reckon that there are some times where I was legitimately afraid. Again, not so much for myself but for my kids. Events that may or may not have contributed to my ‘prepper’ mentality.

Watching the footage on 9/11 was frightening, especially when you understood the implications. I was afraid then that my kids would be living in a war zone. Jump forward to the events in Washington D.C. on 1/6 — this was frightening as well. That footage looked like the films we watched back in high school about third-world despots and coups. I don’t want my kids to ever be touched by that kind of hatred.

fanatical

^{[ fuh–nat-i-kuhl ]}

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adjective

outburst

^{[ out-burst ]}

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noun

a sudden and violent release or outpouring:an outburst of tears.
a sudden spell of activity, energy, etc.
a public disturbance; riot; outbreak.
a bursting forth; eruption.